Top 10 Excuses for not doing a Math Homework
October, 2006
 I accidentally divided by zero and my paper burst into flames.
 Isaac Newton’s birthday.

I could only get arbitrarily close to my textbook. I couldn’t
actually reach it.
 I have the proof, but there isn’t room to write it in this margin.

I was watching the World Series and got tied up trying to prove
that it converged.
 I have a solar powered calculator and it was cloudy.

I locked the paper in my trunk but a fourdimensional dog got in
and ate it.

I couldn’t figure out whether i am the square of negative one or
i is the square root of negative one.
 I took time out to snack on a doughnut and a cup of coffee. I spent the rest of the night trying to figure which one to dunk.

I could have sworn I put the homework inside a Klein bottle, but
this morning I couldn't find it.